GOVERNMENTsteria: Best Rand Paul Festivus Report 2023 Memes
Dr. Fauci’s transgender monkey study, NIH’s meth-head monkeys + monkey casino (gambling for water), USDA’s cutting-edge research (walking dogs in summer) & more Rand Paul Festivus Report 2023 Memes!
While we were all busy with the holidays, Senator Rand Paul released his annual Festivus Report:
In lieu of government memes, we have turned every page of the entire report into images that you can conveniently share as… you guessed it… memes…
Sources: https://themessenger.com/politics/swindlers-used-barbie-dolls-to-rob-covid-relief-program / Sen. Joni Ernst’s Squeal Award: https://outreach.senate.gov/iqextranet/view_newsletter.aspx?id=111433&c=JErnst
Sources: Bureau of the Fiscal Service, “Final Monthly Treasury Statement. Receipts and Outlays of the United States Government For Fiscal Year 2023 Through September 30, 2023 and Other Periods,” U.S. Department of the Treasury, https://www.fiscal.treasury.gov/files/reports-statements/mts/mts0923.pdf; https://www.paul.senate.gov/wp- content/uploads/2023/01/Festivus-23-clean-12.22-v2.pdf; www.cato.org
Sources:
https://www.highergov.com/contract-opportunity/breed-and- maintain-free-ranging-macaca-mulatta-rh-75n93022r00032-r-3a6f0/; https://www.usaspending.gov/award/CONT_IDV_HHSN272201700046I_7529; https://www.postandcourier.com/news/alpha- genesis-takes-over-management-of-south-carolinas-monkey-island/article_fb08a7d2-ce5a-11ed-bd91-8b72f090aac4.html; https://www.usaspending.gov/award/CONT_AWD_HHSN272201800009C_7529_-NONE-_-NONE-; https://blog.whitecoatwaste.org/2021/11/17/bigger-than-beaglegate-dr-faucis-monkey-island-of-death/.
Sources: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g303853-Activities-Esna_Qena_Governorate_Nile_River_Valley.html; https://www.usaspending.gov/award/ASST_NON_72026320CA00006_7200; https://www.usaid.gov/egypt/tourism.
Sources: The White Coat Waste Project brought this study to my attention: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1558787821000393, “This study was partially supported by the USDA-ARS Biophotonics (Grant # 58-6402-3-018)”; https://opensiuc.lib.siu.edu/theses/2520/; https://www.biorxiv.org/content/10.1101/639757v1.full; https://www.ars.usda.gov/about-ars/.
Sources: https://www.cisa.gov/sites/default/files/2023-01/DEIA-Strategic-Plan_508c-FINAL_0.pdf; https://www.cisa.gov/sites/default/files/publications/CISA-YearInReview_v1_508.pdf; https://apnews.com/article/technology-business-health-coronavirus-pandemic-rand-paul-9e8a970398830ea415f7d1fb68f0a95e.
Sources: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9163443/; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/-LnmJEP4kUWIWzmNGNUTkw/project-details/10173912; https://blog.whitecoatwaste.org/2023/04/09/moscow-has-fallen-wcw-defunds-all-russian-animal-labs-putins-kitten-tests/; https://www.whitehouse.gov/ostp/news-updates/2022/06/11/guidance-on-scientific-and-technological-cooperation-with-the-russian-federation-for-u-s-government-and-u-s-government-affiliated-organizations/; https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12145577/1-3BILLION-taxpayer-dollars-funneled-China-Russia-pointless-projects.html; Video: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7865075/.
Sources: "FRAUD ALERT FOLLOW-UP: Improved Sharing of Death Records and Use of the Do Not Pay System Would Strengthen Program Integrity and Better Protect the Public,” May 2023, https://www.pandemicoversight.gov/media/file/do-not-pay-fraud-alert-follow; Written testimony of Michael Horowitz, Chair, Pandemic Response Accountability Committee Inspector General, U.S. Department of Justice, as submitted for Senate HSGAC Committee hearing, Nov. 14, 2023; https://www.gao.gov/assets/gao-20-625.pdf; https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/dead-wrong-feds-sent-1- 4b-stimulus-checks-over-million-n1232070.
Source: DOD purchase order to American Energy Restaurant Equipment Inc., December 2016, https://www.usaspending.gov/award/CONT_AWD_HDEC0417P0013_9700_-NONE-_-NONE-.
Source: “(U) Audit of the Defense Logistics Agency Storage and Care of Repair Parts and Components for Army Ground Combat Systems,” DOD IG Report, October 2023, https://media.defense.gov/2023/Oct/24/2003326664/-1/-1/1/DODIG-2024-001%20SECURE.PDF.
Source: “(U) Audit of the Defense Logistics Agency Storage and Care of Repair Parts and Components for Army Ground Combat Systems,” DOD IG Report, October 2023, https://media.defense.gov/2023/Oct/24/2003326664/-1/-1/1/DODIG-2024- 001%20SECURE.PDF.
Source: “(U) Audit of the Defense Logistics Agency Storage and Care of Repair Parts and Components for Army Ground Combat Systems,” DOD IG Report, October 2023, https://media.defense.gov/2023/Oct/24/2003326664/-1/-1/1/DODIG-2024-001%20SECURE.PDF.
Sources: https://www.cisa.gov/topics/election-security/foreign-influence-operations-and-disinformation/resilience-series-graphic- novels; https://www.cisa.gov/sites/default/files/publications/cfi_real-fake_graphic-novel_508.pdf.
Sources:
https://www.cisa.gov/news-events/news/cisa- releases-second-graphic-novel-combat- disinformation-national-superhero-day.
Sources: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9021839/#S2title, This work was supported by the National Institutes of Health (DA011792, DA043204, DA046778, and DA049886); https://reporter.nih.gov/search/E0aP9k_gFUuBzchajum1MA/project- details/10597619; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/VEFMA-lDBEGDk237GNOUhA/project-details/10663558; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/XSAD_OJAP0aVUcb1fSIhoA/project-details/10651899; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/E0aP9k_gFUuBzchajum1MA/project-details/10597619; https://nida.nih.gov/research-topics/trends-statistics/overdose-death-rates.
Sources: https://www.fec.gov/help-candidates-and-committees/understanding-public-funding-presidential-elections/ https://www.fec.gov/resources/cms-content/documents/PECF_monthly_report_2023.pdf
Sources: The White Coat Waste Project brought this study to my attention: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9232485/, “This research was supported by NIH grants R01 DA038106 (to B.Y.H.), R01 MH 118257 (to S.R.H.)”; https://static-content.springer.com/esm/art%3A10.1038%2Fs41467-022-31273- 9/MediaObjects/41467_2022_31273_MOESM1_ESM.pdf; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/NqHHUGmeykW_som5xUpfyA/projects; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/11mxubF2ck2L9agR9Dz5ug/projects; (image) https://www.ebay.com/itm/193862059679.
Sources: https://www.insider.com/sba-svog-grant-pandemic-relief-fund-post-malone-chris-brown-2023-8; https://data.sba.gov/dataset/4ad86088-4c7b-4525-9562-ecd9488916c9/resource/e99e8853-d322-4533-9231-a52b149d7444/download/awards-as-of-7-5-22.xlsx.
Sources: OpenTheBooks.com brought this to my attention: https://www.openthebooks.com/assets/1/6/Elite_Universities_- _Selected_Grants_v2.pdf; https://reporter.nih.gov/search/79Trf8pSIkaAX7_lxJ7FnA/projects; https://www.pennmedicine.org/news/news-blog/2022/october/covid-misinformation-the-flip-side-of-knowledge-is-power.
Sources: https://reporter.nih.gov/search/_yAOVXcZU0aslyTAXPTPVQ/project-details/10307630; https://blog.whitecoatwaste.org/2021/10/26/beaglegate-a-timeline/; https://www.peta.org/blog/government-funded-hiv-experiment-monkeys-wont-help-transgender-women/.
Sources: https://www.paymentaccuracy.gov/payment-accuracy-high-priority-programs/; https://www.openthebooks.com/substack-federal-agencies-admit-to-3-trillion-in-improper-payments-since-2004/; https://epicforamerica.org/blog/2023-improper-payments-exceed-funding-for-the-u-s-army/; https://www.gao.gov/assets/gao-23-106285.pdf.
Sources: https://coburn.library.okstate.edu/pdf/Wastebook%202014%20FINAL%208.27.2014741a.pdf; Hagen, Susan, “Monkeys Also Believe in Winning Streaks, Study Shows.” University of Rochester Newscenter, 27 June 2014, https://www.eurekalert.org/news-releases/539516; Blanchard, Tommy, Andreas Wilke, & Benjamin Hayden, “Hot-Hand Bias in Rhesus Monkeys.” Journal of Experimental Psychology 40.3 (2014): ProQuest. Web. 16 Oct. 2014, https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2014-25497-001.
The final word:
* Tags updated as of January 8, 2028.
BIDENsteria
Biden Corruption Memes, Biden Documents Memes, Biden Falling Off His Bike Memes, Biden Ice Cream Memes, Biden PIGEONgate Memes, Dark Brandon Memes, Jill Biden Memes, Joe Biden Memes, Hunter Biden Memes, Let’s Go Brandon Memes & Pedo Pete Memes
BIG PHARMA, HEALTH CARE & SCIENTICISM
Big Pharma Memes, Euthanasia Memes, Fake Science Memes, Fat + Body Positivity Memes, Health Alert Memes, Health Care Memes, Moderna Memes, Pfizer Memes & Science Memes
BIG TECH, CENSORSHIP & SOCIAL MEDIA
Bill Gates Memes, Censorship Memes, Elon Musk Memes, Facebook Memes, Mark Zuckerberg Memes & Twitter Memes
CHINAsteria
COVIDsteria Psyop
COVID Amnesty Memes, COVID Hypocrisy Memes, COVID Lab Leak Memes, COVID Lockdown Memes, COVID Mask Memes, COVID Memes, COVID Propaganda Memes, COVID Satire Videos, COVID Science Memes, COVID Variant Memes, Fauci Memes, Public Health Memes, Tedros Memes & WHO Memes
EDUCATIONsteria
ELECTIONsteria & POLITICALsteria
Abortion Memes, AOC Memes, Boris Johnson Memes, Citizens for Sanity Memes, Dianne Feinstein Memes, Donald Trump Memes, Dr. Oz Memes, Election Fraud Memes, Election Memes, Gavin Newsom Memes, GOP Memes, Government Memes, Illegal Immigration Memes, Kamala Harris Memes, Kevin McCarthy Memes, King Charles Memes, Libertarian Memes (Argentina + Milei), Liz Cheney Memes, Liz Truss Memes, Nancy Pelosi Memes, Paul Pelosi Memes, Political Memes, PayPal Memes, Project Veritas Memes, Queen Elizabeth Memes, Roe v Wade Memes, Ron DeSantis Memes, Social Credit Score Memes, Student Loan Forgiveness Memes & Trudeau Memes
FBI & FEDs
Durham Report Memes, False Flag Memes, FBI Hypocrisy Memes, FBI Memes, FED Memes, IRS Memes, January 6th Memes, Mar-A-Lago Raid Memes, Patriot Front Memes & Trump Arrest Memes
GLOBAL WARMINGsteria
Dutch Farmer Memes, Earth Day Memes, Electric Vehicle (EV) Memes, Gas Stove Ban Memes, Global Warming Memes, Greta Thunberg Memes & Ohio Train Derailment Memes
GREAT RESET & WEF
GREAT RESET RESISTANCE
Canadian Trucker Memes, Conspiracy Theory Memes, Dutch Farmer Memes, Great Reset Resistance Memes, Great Reset Resistance Quotes, Memer Memes & Memes
GUN CONTROL
Crime Memes, Gun Control Memes, Mass Shooting Memes, Police Memes, Retail Theft Memes & Uvalde Memes
HOLIDAYsteria
Christmas Memes, Columbus Day Memes, Halloween Memes, Holiday Memes, July 4th Memes, Memorial Day Memes & Thanksgiving Memes
IllEGAL IMMIGRATION
MEDIAsteria
Brian Stelter Memes, CNN Memes, Fox News Memes, Joe Rogan Memes, Media Memes, NPR Memes, PBS Memes, Taylor Lorenz Memes, Tucker Carlson Memes & Washington Post Memes
MONKEYsteria Psyop
PRIDEsteria & PEDOsteria
Balenciaga Memes, Bud Light Memes, Dalai Lama Memes, Gender Memes, Groomer Memes, Jeffrey Epstein Memes, Monkeypox Memes, Pedo Pete Memes, Pride Month Memes, Sam Brinton Memes, Transgender Memes & Transwomen in Women's Sports Memes
RACEsteria
RANDOM PSYOPs or NOISE
Australia Memes, British Memes, California Memes, Canada Memes, Feminism Memes, France Memes, Miscellaneous Memes & UFO Memes
RECESSION & INFLATION
Baby Formula Shortage Memes, Bank Collapse Memes, Bidenomics Memes, Digital Currency Memes, Egg Shortage Memes, High Gas Price Memes, Inflation Memes, Inflation Reduction Act Memes, Jim Cramer Memes & Recession Memes
RUSSOphobia & RUSSIAsteria + WW3steria
Brittney Griner Memes, FTX Memes, General Milley Memes, Middle East War Memes, Nord Stream Memes, Putin Memes, Russia Invades Ukraine Memes, Russia Memes, Ukraine Biolab Memes, Ukraine Corruption Memes, Ukraine Hypocrisy Memes, Ukraine Nazi Memes, WW3 Memes & Zelensky Memes
VACCINEs
Damar Hamlin Memes, Died Suddenly Memes, Moderna Memes, Novak Djokovic Memes, Pfizer Memes, Sudden Adult Death Syndrome Memes, Vaccine Booster Memes, Vaccine Hesitancy Memes, Vaccine Karma Memes, Vaccine Memes, Vaccine Passport Memes & Vaccine Side Effect Memes
VIDEOs
WOKE CORPORATIONs & ORGANIZATIONs
Balenciaga Memes, DuckDuckGo Hypocrisy Memes, Big Tech Memes, Bud Light Memes, Hollywood Memes, Miller Light Memes, Netflix Memes, Super Bowl Memes, Woke Corporations, Woke Disney Memes, Woke Military Memes & Woke Target Memes
COVIDsteria: An Oral History of America’s Great Reset (Table of Contents) is a fictional satire along the lines of a Studs Terkel oral history or Max Brooks' World War Z published as a serialized book on Substack while Tales From the Great Reset is our occasional satirical short-story series and BREAD&CIRCUSES posts are weekly humor roundups. In addition, check out our Community + Links to Alternative COVID & Great Reset Resources...
Seems to me I recall somebody in the 90s got a government grant to test the effects of tequila on goldfish.
Outrageously lacking in compassion for animals and needlessly causing suffering is not a sign of enlightened behavior, regardless how many fancy degrees and initials behind a person's name.